So I just got Mom settled into the skilled nursing facility. The sights and sounds bring back so many memories of my dad, and his final year that was mostly spent in a nursing home. Of course, the circumstances were different. Dad had dementia and was placed in a memory care unit because he was no longer manageable at home. Mom is recovering from major surgery and trying to regain her independence.
Dad’s case was pretty much hopeless. I have a bit more hope for my mom, but let’s face it, no one wants to be in one of these facilities. Who would want to rely on strangers to do the simplest of tasks for them?
There was a patient wandering the hall saying she was bleeding. A couple of others were mumbling to themselves around the nurse’s station, which was unmanned. I felt so sad as I left Mom there, after sitting with her for dinner. I’m not sure why the nursing home bothers me more than the hospital. There are so many similarities.
I know a part of me wonders if Mom will ever check out of the facility I have placed her in and return home. Mom was the one adamant about not returning home yet; she’s not even able to walk around on her own with a walker yet. So I don’t have guilt about that, it’s just that all of these facilities are so woefully understaffed. I know my mom will be waiting for help and it will take forever for someone to respond.
Perhaps my dad was the lucky one. He was less aware of being neglected.
At least I hope he was.