Lack of control is scary

So Mom had to go on antibiotics for a tooth infection, and it seems to be causing her G.I. issues that are manifesting themselves through her colostomy bag. This is to be expected, as antibiotics are known for causing side effects like that. I’m going to check with the home health agency to make sure probiotics are safe to give her.

Mom of course is depressed about the prospects of a colostomy bag for the rest of her life, and the lack of control she feels it presents. But the flip side isn’t always pretty either. Dad lost control of his bladder and bowels as his dementia took over. This manifested itself once he was in the nursing home. On my first visit, he would still try to communicate that he needed to go to the bathroom. By my second visit, he was completely incontinent.

One of the most painful memories I have of Dad’s stay at the nursing home was the call I got from one of the nursing assistants. They told me Dad had been taken to the E.R. This was nothing new by that point. I asked if he had fallen again. No, the staff member said. He had gotten into a fight with another resident. Dad had went into the other resident’s room, ripped off his diaper, and defecated. As one might expect, the other resident was not too happy. He hit Dad as he tried to get Dad out of his room.

Losing control can be a mental or physical thing, and sometimes it’s both. Mom is mentally aware and the loss of physical control is hard for her to deal with. I’m not sure if Dad realized the abilities he was losing rapidly to Alzheimer’s. It’s again one of those terrible mysteries that has to be buried with Dad.

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2 Comments

Filed under Memories

2 responses to “Lack of control is scary

  1. Yogurt with active cultures sometimes helps me when I am on an antibiotic.

  2. Yes, yogurt is good as well, and Mom has some of that on hand!

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