Today is rainy, chilly and dreary, just like three years ago when I received the dreaded phone call that my father had died.
Everything else is so much different.
One of my favorite photos.
Little did I know at the time that I had taken the first of many significant dips on the roller coaster of life. Mom, always the picture of health, was diagnosed with stage III colon cancer just seven months after my father’s death. I quit my job to take care of her for the next six months. It would be another year before I secured any regular work.
I discovered that freelancing is best approached when you have time to plan and build clients, not for a sudden source of steady income. I learned that being a really good employee doesn’t get you very far in this job market.
And perhaps most importantly, I immersed myself in the world of Alzheimer’s activism, and learned so much from the stories I read.
So I am definitely a different person than the one who answered that phone in the middle of the newsroom on December 20, 2011. I hope I’m a bit wiser, and a lot more compassionate.
Tonight I will light a candle, toast Dad’s spirit with a glass of Irish whiskey and remember his wonderful singing voice, realizing that one can smile and mourn at the same time.
![Pageflex Persona [document: PRS0000038_00069]](https://memoriesproject.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/reluctant-caregiver-cover.jpg)
The Memories Project 
Hugs. It has been three and a half for me. I miss him so much.
Wonderful post. I’m helping take care of my mom who has dementia and my dad is 13 years gone this past September and still very much missed, especially around this time. Life is definitely a roller coaster with Mom who is now under hospice care. Each day is a gift. She loves chocolate and on Christmas I plan to share chocolate covered cherries with her – our little salute to Dad; it wasn’t Christmas until he opened his box of chocolate covered cherries!
So true, we must find the good in each day. My dad also loved a sweet treat when he was in the memory care facility … my mom is the one who loves chocolate covered cherries!
I know what you mean…certain dates just loom on the calendar…I am writing about that now in a post I hope will be ready for what would have been my mom’s 100th birthday next month…I hope you are able to take solace and strength from everything you do for both your parents. With wishes for a Christmas of comfort and joy, Hallie
Thanks Hallie! Merry Christmas to you as well.
Sometimes the holidays are difficult enough, let alone to have a loss at this time of year. I know this is a couple of days after, but bless you and your dad on the other side. I love that video and what you did in honor of him (candle & whiskey) on this anniversary. Hugs.