This is the first Mother’s Day I will experience motherless. At this time last year, Mom was quickly approaching death. In fact, I got her flowers early because I was afraid she might not live until Mother’s Day.
Knowing that would be the last Mother’s Day she would be alive was difficult. How do you express a lifetime of gratitude into a single day?
But experiencing Mother’s Day without a living mother is equally as difficult.
It is almost impossible to avoid the holiday. Mother’s Day ads are online, in stores, on TV … reminders to honor your mother are everywhere. I received an email reminder from the florist, to remind me I bought Mom flowers last year, and did I want to order again this year? I’m sure the business thought this was a good selling tool, but it was just a gut-wrenching reminder of the sadness I felt when placing that order. (On the flip side, Mom loved the flowers.)
I just got back from a visit to what was my parents’ condo. Each trip I am trying to make a few changes, to slowly transition it from a place of sadness and illness, which it became over the last several years of my parents’ life, to a peaceful mountain respite that my parents enjoyed for many years.
My mother’s perfume still lingers in the bedroom. Of course I reflected on the events of last year while I was there, but I busied myself by putting together new furniture and rearranging things to make it my own. It’s what my parents would want, and I left the condo feeling fairly good about the progress.
And now, a week of nonstop Mother’s Day advertisements to navigate. I know at least a few fellow bloggers who have lost their mothers in recent years, so I know you understand how it feels. Certainly just because our mothers are no longer living doesn’t mean we cannot honor their life on Mother’s Day, and that’s what I intend upon doing.
How will you mark Mother’s Day?
4 responses to “May is for Mother”
I’ve been wondering how this one will affect me, as my mother was still living one month ago. I will probably do my best to NOT reflect on it this year. We’ll see what really happens.
I totally understand, there is absolutely no harm in skipping. My condolences to you and your family.
This broke my heart. In being my blunt self, I’ve always despised Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and Valentine’s Day. I can’t help but think of those people who don’t have parents, aren’t parents themselves, and/or don’t have a sweetheart. I don’t know why we have to have these particular days to show someone we love them when we should be doing it all the time while they’re with us. To me, these holidays serve mostly as heartache for many.
My mom is not doing well. I’m very concerned she won’t make it to next year’s Mother’s Day. Thank you for reminding me to enjoy this day with her now that we live nearby.
God Bless you throughout this week. I hope you have something in mind to get you through the day. Wish I could invite you over here.
I’m sorry to hear that your mother is not doing well, I hope you get to enjoy some quality time with her.
I totally agree about all of these Hallmark holidays, true love of family and friends shines through each and every day. Thanks you for the kind words.