I hope you and your loved ones are able to reconnect in person this Memorial Day weekend. More opportunities to spend time with our elders abound with Father’s Day and July the 4th. Enjoy these special moments together, but also put this time to good use by having “the talk” about your loved one’s health care wishes.
Recently the University of Michigan published results of a poll that found COVID-19 had not prompted a significant increase in family discussions about what to do if one is struck with a severe illness or facing end-of-life care. If a deadly pandemic doesn’t prompt such discussions, then what can?
I understand how difficult these conversations can be. In my book, The Reluctant Caregiver, I discuss the challenges I had in initiating these discussions with my own parents. But I also talk about how my parents’ reluctance to make end-of-life care choices came with significant consequences for our family when they became ill. That is why I champion so passionately for everyone to have these talks and make these important health care decisions so your loved one’s wishes (and your own wishes) can be honored.
If you need assistance getting started, refer to the helpful resources section at the end of the University of Michigan Health Lab article. I also recommend Five Wishes. For those who have successfully had “the talk” with their loved ones, I’d love to hear your approach.
I’ve been at the Aging in America conference all week and it has been sobering and inspiring to be surrounded by so many smart, compassionate, and determined people. There are many battles to fight when it comes to issues surrounding aging and caregiving, but we have an army of advocates ready to fight for those who have been ignored by society and by government for too long.
There were recurring themes that came up at every session I attended. Here are some of the main areas of concern:
- Health care: While it may be a political issue to those in Congress and to some voters, for those who work with seniors, the disabled, and the poor, health insurance is truly a do or die decision. The concerns about the current administration and the Republican’s proposed ACA repeal plan were explained through data and powerful anecdotal evidence. However you may feel about the ACA, and certainly it is not perfect, with some people hit with skyrocketing premiums and limited choice, there were millions of people who were able to get the treatment they desperately needed, mainly because of the ACA’s expansion of Medicaid. Don’t think you’ll need Medicaid? As one expert put it, with long-term care so expensive and not covered by Medicare, many of us will end up on Medicaid at some point, if we live long enough.
- Diversity: While diversity can sometimes be an empty buzzword, I found that the attendees of the Aging in America conference take diversity issues very seriously. From how a doctor discusses Alzheimer’s care to a Latino family versus a Caucasian family to senior housing that welcomes the LGBT community, our aging policy must reflect the diversity of our country.
- Help for caregivers: The issue that I’m most passionate about was also a major topic of discussion at the conference. There are many individuals and organizations dedicated to offering relief to caregivers, in the form of grants and other financial assistance, better training and support, and through respite care. I received positive feedback about my Respite Care Share concept, and I hope through the networking made at the conference, I can help take the concept to the next level.
The conference wraps up Friday, and I hope that the brainstorming that took place in Chicago this week will lead to positive impact in your communities.