Tag Archives: dementia

Two new movies take fresh spin on eldercare, Alzheimer’s

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I’m always on the lookout for films dealing with caregiving issues, Alzheimer’s and other dementias, as well as those that offer an honest look at growing older. I came across two interesting movies this week that I want to pass along to kick off your weekend. The first is Senior Love Triangle and the second one is Ice Cream in the Cupboard.

These films offer a unique perspective and won’t be to everyone’s liking. For those who prefer to keep their movies more in the PG range with no profanity, you may want to take a pass.  I found both films to be moving and thought-provoking, offering a raw yet empathetic look at the challenges that aging can present. More films are tackling topics such as aging, dementia, and family caregiving and I wholeheartedly support this trend.

Senior Love Triangle is based upon a photo book by Isadora Kosofsky. The story and moving images follow an 84-year-old man who is attempting to balance his relationships with 81-year-old Jeanie and 90-year-old Adina, with nursing homes serving as the backdrop. Dementia, other mental illness and how vulnerable seniors are preyed upon also are part of the storyline. Adult children often have a hard time with their elder loved ones finding romance in the care center environment, but this movie shows how important such affection and human connection is to older people.

Ice Cream in the Cupboard is about a middle-aged couple whose lives change forever after the wife is diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s in her mid-fifties. The movie is based upon a true story. I appreciated how realistically the film depicted the challenges in dementia caregiving. It never shied away from the more brutal, violent aspects and never sugarcoated what Alzheimer’s caregivers may face on their journeys. However, there is also much love and devotion on display.

Both of these movies are available on video on demand. If you’ve seen these films, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

 

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Adapting to a new normal

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I recently was interviewed for a new caregiving project called Open Caregiving. The website serves as a collection for caregivers to share their experiences and offer advice to other caregivers. I was happy to participate.

If you would like to share your caregiving story, fill out this form.

One of the pieces of advice I offered that proved to be a key for me in thinking about my father’s dementia was to learn how to accept the “new normal.” While it is natural to lament what your life was like before, who your loved one with dementia was before the disease changed them, it is not helpful to be consumed with the past. Cherish those memories and try to focus on the present.

This was very hard for my mother and I to do as my father’s Alzheimer’s disease progressed further. My mother couldn’t help but correct all of the mistaken memories or gibberish that came out of my father’s mouth and I felt shame and embarrassment for my father’s state of mind. I knew how mortified he would be if he could see himself in that state of mental decline. I discuss this further in my book, The Reluctant Caregiver.

But what helped once my father was in the memory care center was simply to visit him and enjoy his company in that moment. If that meant getting him a cup of coffee or navigating him around the outdoor area for a stroll, then that was enough. I would no longer be able to discuss politics or sports with my father but I could still hold his hand and tell him I loved him.

I hope you are finding ways to adjust to the new normal as you wind your way through your own journey as a dementia caregiver.

 

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“Solo” Walks (aka I Walk Alone But It’s Fine You’re There) — When Dementia Knocks

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I connected with this post on many levels. I am an only child as the author is and I often think about how various diseases, especially dementia, would challenge my fierce independent streak. There is such a valuable lesson here for those who are encountering the early stages of dementia and dementia caregivers.

When I was in my 20’s, I spent a lot of time volunteering for hospice. One of my first hospice patients was a woman in her 60’s who had dementia. Her son lived with her, but he needed a weekly respite. I was told she was active and liked to go for walks. In fact, […]

via “Solo” Walks (aka I Walk Alone But It’s Fine You’re There) — When Dementia Knocks

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July 11, 2020 · 7:13 pm

Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month book sale

June is Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month, a time to raise awareness of Alzheimer’s disease and to decrease the stigma and silence that too often accompanies an Alzheimer’s diagnosis.

To mark this important campaign, AlzAuthors hosts a book sale and giveaway each June. AlzAuthors is a global community of authors writing about Alzheimer’s and dementia from personal experience, whether as a caregiver or as a person living with these conditions.

I’m proud to be a part of this organization, and I’m excited my book, The Reluctant Caregiver, is a part of this sale. From June 15th through June 22nd you can get my book for half off and find great deals in a variety of genres, including fiction, memoir, non-fiction, and children’s and teen literature. Most are available in Kindle and e-book formats, and many are available in paperback and audio. AlzAuthors is proud to share its library of carefully vetted books to help guide you on your own dementia journey.

SHOP NOW: Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month book sale and giveaway sponsored by AlzAuthors

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Why Dementia Means Letting Go (and Why My 2020 Theme is “Let Go”) — When Dementia Knocks

This blog post written by Elaine M. Eshbaugh, PhD, has such a good message for all of us right now, especially caregivers. It is so true that you must learn to “let go” when dealing with dementia. Those of us who have been dementia caregivers have navigated our ways through “new normals” before. Stay safe and don’t be too hard on yourself.

So what’s your personal 2020 theme? (Can you answer this question without using a four-letter word that would’ve gotten you in trouble at recess?) You’ve got your personal and family challenges, which likely include dementia since you are reading my blog. You’ve got whatever chaos is happening in your community. Maybe people are arguing about […]

via Why Dementia Means Letting Go (and Why My 2020 Theme is “Let Go”) — When Dementia Knocks

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June 12, 2020 · 9:57 pm

Are There Do’s and Don’ts When it Comes to Dementia? — We Are Dementia Strong

This is a great list from We Are Dementia Strong. Basically it boils down to treating your loved one with dementia like the person you’ve known, not solely by their dementia. This disease tries to strip people of their humanity and its caregivers’ duty to try and maintain dignity whenever possible.

Some other friends just may find it too hard to see me like I am. I didn’t like seeing my Grandfather or my Mother while they were on their Alzheimer’s Journey so, I understand.

via Are There Do’s and Don’ts When it Comes to Dementia? — We Are Dementia Strong

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May 30, 2020 · 5:31 pm

How to know it’s time to consider Memory Care? — The Diary of An Alzheimer’s Caregiver

With extra time spent at home in the midst of a pandemic, you may be in touch with your elder relatives more than ever. This is a great time to review the health status of your older relatives. When people are thrown off their routine, symptoms of dementia may become more apparent. This post from The Diary of an Alzheimer’s Caregiver offers excellent tips on when to consider memory care.

Sign up to get these posts and a whole lot more delivered right to your inbox! The Diary of An Alzheimer’s Caregiver – Appreciate the good, laugh at the crazy, and deal with the rest! Brain disorders like Alzheimer’s, Dementia, etc. are progressive conditions. In these diseases, the patient’s health tends to deteriorate with time.…

via How to know it’s time to consider Memory Care? — The Diary of An Alzheimer’s Caregiver

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Stay at Home with a Good Book – AlzAuthors Anthology Two is Now Available in Paperback — AlzAuthors: Alzheimer’s and Dementia Books, Blogs, Stories

Honored to have been able to share my caregiving experience that inspired The Reluctant Caregiver included in this collection.

Life these days is turned upside down for most of us, due to the COVID-19 pandemic. There is so much uncertainty, fear, and loss. Those of us caring for loved ones with Alzheimer’s and other dementias find ourselves stressed, not only from our usual pressures but the new ones the virus has delivered: stay-at-home orders…

via Stay at Home with a Good Book – AlzAuthors Anthology Two is Now Available in Paperback — AlzAuthors: Alzheimer’s and Dementia Books, Blogs, Stories

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April 17, 2020 · 4:49 pm

Review the 2020 Alzheimer’s Disease Facts and Figures

The Alzheimer’s Association released their annual report around the time the coronavirus pandemic was ramping up, but I did not want to overlook the latest findings. I thought it was especially appropriate to post this today, on what would have been my father’s 88th birthday.

Here are the main takeaways from the 2020 Alzheimer’s Disease Facts and Figures report:

  • Alzheimer’s is the sixth leading cause of death in the U.S. 1 in 3 seniors die with Alzheimer’s or another dementia. The death rate from Alzheimer’s has skyrocketed. Between 2000 and 2018, the number of deaths from Alzheimer’s disease has more than doubled, increasing 146%.
  • More than 5 million Americans live with Alzheimer’s disease. Women make up two-thirds of that number; African-Americans are about twice as likely to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or other dementias compared to whites in the same age group; Hispanics are about 1.5 times as likely to develop Alzheimer’s or other dementias compared to whites in the same age group.
  • Unless significant medical breakthroughs are made, by 2050, the number of Americans age 65 and older with Alzheimer’s dementia may grow to a projected 13.8 million.
  • 16 million unpaid dementia caregivers provide care valued at $244 billion annually. One in three caregivers are 65 and over, and two-thirds are women. One-quarter of dementia caregivers belong to the “sandwich generation,” caring for both an aging parent and minor children.
  • The cost of Alzheimer’s care to the nation is staggering. In 2020 alone, Alzheimer’s and other dementias will cost the nation $305 billion. What’s even more sobering is that half of primary care physicians believe the American healthcare system is not prepared for the growing number of those with Alzheimer’s and other dementias.

While these reports highlight the challenges we face in providing care for our loved ones with Alzheimer’s and other dementias, the Alzheimer’s Association proposes an action plan focused on education and recruitment to build up a corps of geriatric providers who understand the unique challenges that those with dementia and their caregivers face. The Alzheimer’s Association also encourages greater funding in the areas of rural healthcare and telemedicine.

2020 alz report

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Guest post: How to Help Your Senior Loved One Stay Healthy from Afar

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I’ve been blessed recently to have two guest authors submit pieces to share on The Memories Project. Today’s post is written by Claire Wentz of Caring from Afar. It is an especially appropriate topic to discuss as we practice social distancing due to the coronavirus.

When you have a senior loved one who lives far away, it can be stressful to ensure they are well taken care of at all times. Travel may not always be feasible, especially if you work outside the home or have family obligations, and it can be expensive. Fortunately, there are some things you can do to ensure that your loved one is safe, healthy, and comfortable no matter how far away you are. Using technology to your advantage is always a good idea; here are some tips on how you can utilize it as well as some ideas on how to help the senior in your life stay safe and happy.

Take Advantage of Smartphones

Smartphones are a useful tool for seniors since they provide a way to contact friends and loved ones as well as a way to stream content and play games and puzzles via apps that will help keep their cognitive skills sharp. You can also download a location-tracking app to their phone so that you can locate your loved one in case of emergencies. If your loved one is unsure of how to use a smart device, look for a class near them (or online) that will help them learn the ins and outs of phones and tablets.

Help Them Invest in Smart Tech

These days, there are several different kinds of smart tech available for the home, and it’s a great way for seniors to be more independent and safe. From home security systems to voice-activated virtual assistants and smart appliances, there are so many ways seniors can utilize technology in their everyday lives and make it a seamless transition. Talk to your loved one about their specific needs, such as whether they could use a virtual assistant that will give them voice control over everything from making phone calls to turning on the oven.

Help Them Find a Hobby

Hobbies are wonderful things; not only do they help us stay happy and boost our mental health, but they can also affect our physical wellness. From playing a sport to woodworking and gardening, there are many different kinds of hobbies out there that are perfect for seniors of any age. So, talk to your loved one about their favorite things to do and help them find a group in their area to join or an online group where they can feel like they’re a part of something and remain social. If the hobby involves physical activity, all the better, as seniors need daily exercise in order to prevent many health issues and falls.

Talk to Their Neighbors

Whether your loved one owns their home or rents an apartment, it’s a good idea to talk to their neighbors and get to know them a little. Creating a rapport with the people closest to your loved one will help to give you peace of mind when you live far away, as they may be able to help out when you’re not there. Exchange information so you can stay in touch with one another, especially if your loved one lives alone or is aging in place.

Helping a loved one stay healthy and safe when you live far away can be challenging, but with the aid of technology and a few lifestyle changes, the senior in your life can ensure that they are safe and comfortable throughout the years.

Learn more caregiver tips at Caring from Afar.

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