Tag Archives: fall

A new season, full of old memories

joy-dad-2002-fall

Fall is my favorite season. I love the cooler weather, and breaking out those sweaters. I like watching the leaves change color, though sometimes raking up all of those leaves is overwhelming! Hey, at least it’s good exercise.

But fall can be a difficult time for those of us who have lost loved ones. Whether you celebrate the holidays or not, it’s difficult, if not impossible, to escape the holiday spirit that takes over the country this time of year. I read this week that a radio station has already switched over to an all-holiday song format!

With the change in season, I’ve been a bit nostalgic lately. This photo with my father was taken in the fall of 2002. I can’t believe it has been 14 years. At the time, it had been awhile since I had seen my parents and my first reaction was that they looked “so old.” Little did I know what was in store. Dad would lose his mind to dementia, my mother would battle colon cancer.

But in 2002, my parents were enjoying a modest but comfortable retirement. I was earning a modest, but independent living. What we consider to be a mundane moment can turn out to be a moment to treasure.

I’m glad I have this photo with my father. It is one of the few I have before the dementia took hold, a moment in our lives when things were blessedly status quo. Don’t let those moments pass you by, document them if you can. You’ll be grateful for the memories later.

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Time marches on, with or without us

Today it has been five months since my mother died. With the crisp mornings of fall now greeting me each day, it’s the second season I’m experiencing without Mom. It will be the first year without a Halloween card from Mom, a holiday we both enjoyed and that my mom always tried to make fun for me as a child.

I was looking through photos and came across one from just about a year ago. It was taken in Nov. 2014, when Mom was already beginning her final battle. The pain was at least somewhat bearable then, but she’d already been to the ER.

It’s one of the last pictures I have of the two of us together. She’s still smiling, still has her makeup on, was still Mom.

mom-joy-nov2014

Even though she wasn’t well then, little did we know that six months later, she would be dead.

I guess I can take some solace in the fact that she didn’t suffer that long, though it felt like to me she did. Some people can go on for years suffering much worse than my mom did.

I’m glad I made the tradition of taking selfies with Mom at the end of each trip home, even if they are not of the best quality.

We have to capture the fleeting happy moments together as best we can.

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